A Supporting Role in a Perfect Plan

A Supporting Role in a Perfect Plan

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

‘She’ was a birthmother who had chosen us to be her baby girl’s adoptive family. His excitement mirrored the joy building inside of me and my husband – our ceaseless prayers to grow our family were being answered!

The birthmother was married with two young sons, but a brief estrangement in the marriage had resulted in a baby girl, now seven months old. Her husband was unwilling to raise a child that was not his own. She was being asked to make an impossible choice, one that would leave her with a gaping hole in her arms and heart.

We began to visit the baby in foster care and after each visit the anticipation of bringing her home grew in intensity. Friends threw us a baby shower filled with everything small, soft, and pink. And then the phone rang.

“She changed her mind.”

The birthmother’s husband had a change of heart, and with that obstacle gone, an adoption plan was no longer under consideration. Tears flowed instantly. The one thing that I had feared the most about pursuing adoption had happened. We dreaded telling our son, terrified of breaking his tender joyful heart.

Father God, we believe your plans are perfect even when the outcome is not what we prayed for. Thank you for allowing us peace in our faith in You, even in difficult and painful situations.

His response took us by surprise. “It’s okay, Mommy. Somebody else will pick us.” His childhood faith inspired us to lean even more heavily on God as we grieved this loss.

It didn’t ease our heartbreak at the time, but now I understand that bringing this baby home was not meant to be a part of our story. Instead, we had played an important supporting role. The birthmother needed to be on the precipice of letting her child go in order to make the best decision. This baby girl was where God meant her to be, and my family had a critical part in getting her there.

When we experience disappointment and intense heartbreak, it is natural to wonder why God would allow such things to happen. It’s important to remember that God’s plans are perfect, even when they don’t happen as we expect. If we lose faith in His goodness, we can miss the role He has carefully selected us for. While it was not easy, my family chose to trust God’s perfect will for all of us. We continued with the adoption process despite the setback. Nine months later, the child chosen to be our daughter was delivered into our arms.

We’ll never forget the baby we helped deliver to where she belonged.